Aficionados of the Bathroom Reader have long remarked on Uncle John's ability to select quintessential quotations. The ever-accommodating Uncle John has responded to this shameless praise by flushing out the all-time best and most hilarious quotes to form this cunning compilation. Highlights include Five Things You Should Never Do ("Never test the depth of a river with both feet"), Seven Classic Shakespearean Insults ("Thy food is such as hath been belch'd on by infected lungs"), and pithy rock talk from the likes of Ozzy Osbourne, Neil Young, and Frank Zappa ("Rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.").